I am grateful

Just had my Q3 review. I know it's rare to hear but I am really grateful for my manager. Every time I am done with my catch-up, I feel reenergized. How rare is that! 

Thank you, N!

Hey, how's your summer 2026?

Here in the UK, it's one heatwave after another.  It starts to feel like my birth country! But, you know, it cools down blissfully in the evening (most nights), I have a lot less occurrence of eczema than I used to in summer, and my folks are with me. My body still functions normally when it gets hot. I am surrounded by loved ones with love. I am the lucky one.

I got stressed yesterday because of a work thing. Then I saw this today: The sky doesn’t change, even in a storm. And I started to breath normally. Yes I made an unintentional admin oversight. I owned up to it and I also emphasized the risk-to-benefit ratio, which remains highly in our favor. Just connect with your inner sky, the happiest man said. It's never been truer.

And that led to this reflection. I've been going through many professional challenges in my long work life. only very recently did I realize how much it has helped shaped and consolidated the idea about what kind of person I want to be. Always do the right thing and help others when you can. That's what I've been living my life. I know it's hard sometimes but this has helped me sleep so much better at night and makes me a content person.

I wish you a good summer.

I make - Japanese Curry Powder

This homemade Japanese curry powder mix came from SpiceRally. The flavor is gentle but unmissable exotic fragrance from the subcontinent. I have most of the ingredients at home (how amazing) but used Chinese 5-spice and garlic/herb seasoning to replace star anise down to ground thyme. Also, I didn't dry roast the whole lot. Instead, I cook the spice during curry preparation during the onion caramelization stage.

Japanese Curry Powder

Ingredients:

- 2 tbsp Ground Turmeric
- 4 tsp Ground Coriander Seeds
- 3 tsp Ground Cumin Seeds
- 1 ½ tsp Ground Fenugreek Seeds
- 1 tsp Ground Fennel Seeds
- 1 tsp Cinnamon Powder
- 1 tsp Ground Black Pepper
- 1 tsp Ground Green Cardamom
- 1 tsp Ground Star Anise
- 1 tsp Ground Ginger

- ½ tsp Ground Cloves
- ½ tsp Ground Allspice Berries
- 1 tsp Dried Mandarin Peel Powder
- 1 tsp Cayenne Pepper Powder
- 1 tsp Garlic Powder

- 1 tsp Ground Bay Leaves
- 1 tsp Ground Sage (dried)
- 1 tsp Ground Thyme (dried)

Directions ~

- Add Ingredients
- Mix well to combine
- Transfer to a grinder jar
- Grind until well incorporated
- Transfer to a pan
- Dry-toast until aromatic for 1-2 minutes (low heat)
- Let cool
- Store in an air-tight container
- Enjoy!

I make - Anna Jones's Red Cabbage Soup

Post Christmas, half red cabbage left, despite my best effort buying the smallest tolerable one. Thinking that if regular cabbage makes good soup, perhaps red cabbage too? My web search led me to Anna Jones's purple soup. Her creative use of caraway seeds transformed red cabbage completely. It tastes so differently from any other soup I've made and comforting in mouth, perfect for a freezing night like tonight.

Red Cabbage Soup (adapted from Anna Jones's recipe)

Ingredients
500g red cabbage, finely shredded
2 tbsp red wine vinegar
Butter or olive oil, for frying
1 large red onion, peeled and finely chopped
3 sticks of celery, finely chopped
2 apples (I used one carrot)
1½ tsp caraway seeds
1.5 litres vegetable stock
2 tbsp balsamic vinegar
2 tsp honey or sugar

To serve
50g walnuts, crumbled
1 small bunch of dill, leaves chopped, fronds reserved for garnishing
4 tbsp sour cream or thick yoghurt
Salt and black pepper

Instruction

Put the cabbage into a bowl with a good pinch of salt and the red wine vinegar, scrunch together in your hands, then put to one side to pickle. (Notes: I didn't do the pickling step and the soup tastes great)

Warm a little butter or oil in a heavy-bottomed saucepan over a medium-low heat. Add the onion and celery. Sweat, stirring occasionally, for 15 minutes, or until soft and translucent.

Meanwhile, peel and roughly chopped the carrot.

Once the onions are soft and sweet, add the caraway seeds and stir for a minute. Turn the heat up a little, add the carrots and ¾ of the cabbage to the onions. Fry for a further 5 minutes, or until the cabbage begins to soften.

Add the stock, balsamic vinegar and honey or agave syrup. Bring to a boil, then reduce the heat, cover and simmer for 30 minutes. Remove the lid and simmer for another 10 minutes.

Meanwhile, heat some oil in a frying pan. Once it’s really hot, add the rest of the cabbage and cook until it’s crisp. For the last couple of minutes add the walnuts and half the dill.

Stir the rest of the dill into the soup and season to taste with salt and pepper. Blitz it to a vibrant purple soup. Ladle the soup into warmed bowls and top each with the cabbage and walnuts, a spoonful of sour cream or yoghurt and some more dill, if you like.

I make - Ox Cheek Stew

It's not a tomato heavy stew but still with nice color and taste. The lemon bits are a nice touch.

 

Ox Cheek Stew (inspired by Alison Roman's Short Rib recipe)

Precooking ox cheek

1000 g Ox Cheek, in big chunks
Water, enough to submerge the beef
2 star anises
2 cloves of garlic
2 slices of ginger
1 onion or 2 banana shallots
1 tbsp tomato paste
1 tbsp soy sauce


Stew ingredients

Freshly ground black pepper
2 tablespoons neutral oil
1 lemon, sliced and seeds removed
1 large yellow onion, peeled, quartered
1 garlic head, peeled and separate cloves
1 red bell pepper
1 carrot
2 tablespoon tomato paste
2 teaspoons gochujang
2 bay leaves
1 tsp Italian dried herbs or 4 thyme sprigs
1 tablespoon sugar
1/4 cup vinegar or pickle juice
Beef broth
Salt and pepper to season
1 cup parsley and/or cilantro, tender leaves and stems, finely chopped

Preparation

Pre-cook the ox cheek in a pressure cooker for 18 minutes along with all listed ingredients. The minimum ingredient is water plus beef. The more ingredients you add, the better the broth is. Turn off heat after pressure cooking time. Set the pot aside to continue its natural release.

Use food processor to chop onion, garlic, red bell pepper and carrot.

Heat the oil in a large Dutch oven over medium-high heat. Cook the chopped vegetables and lemon slices, stirring occasionally, until they get a bit of color.

Add the tomato paste and gochujang. Cook for a minute or two. If the pot looks a bit dry, add some water or white wine to deglaze.

Add the bay leaves, dried herbs, sugar, vinegar and enough broth to submerge everything. Using a wooden spoon or spatula, scrape up the bits on the bottom of the pot.

Add the precooked ox cheeks back in and bring to a strong simmer. Season with salt and pepper. Cover the pot and lower the heat to low-medium. Let it simmer for 1 hour, with the last 30 mins lid off.

Check the ox cheek. They should be tender enough to insert your knife or chop stick in. If not, back on the heat for more cooking.

Serve straight from the pot or transfer the stew to a shallow bowl or plate with high sides, spooning the braising liquid over. Sprinkle with the herb mixture before serving.

2025 Reflections - Notes on a very full year

Where to start? What a year 2025 turned out to be. If 2024 was about change, then this past year felt like that same chapter but written in bold CAPITAL letters.

The first half of the year felt like a masterclass in how to do everything at once. Between hiring a new team, working with my first external mentor, running CV workshops, and organizing a brainstorm day, I felt like I was constantly switching my brain between different frequencies. But amidst that chaos, there were such beautiful pockets of humanity. Having an old friend visit was a true soul recharge. Reconnecting with a former colleague and learning the ropes of leadership kept me going, even when things felt heavy.

Can an empathic leader really work?

Lately I have been thinking a lot about my role as a manager. Sure, I am officially the Head of Group, but most days I honestly feel like the group secretary. I give the overall direction, but I also find myself anticipating everyone else's needs and acting as a human alarm clock for every single deadline. I find myself wondering if I am doing too much. Should grown adults not be responsible for their own schedules?

I try to be an empathetic leader, but I have started to feel like some people take that as a signal to just ride over me. I am still trying to find that right boundary. I know I shouldn't just be their buddy, but there is so much gray area in between. Finding that balance is my mission for 2026. While it is easy to focus on the few who take advantage of my kindness when I am exhausted at 6:00 PM, I am making a conscious effort to pivot my focus to those who genuinely appreciate the support.

There is also the situation with a new senior level colleague. I have been doing my best to help him get settled, but it is starting to feel like he is taking advantage of that. It feels like his goal is to use my help just to beat me. I don't really understand why some people cannot just help each other without making it a competition. I am not going to change who I am or stop being helpful, but I do feel a bit lost as to why it has to be this way.

What truly matters

This year brought health scares that we did not see coming. First it was me, and then it was my husband. I am mostly in the clear now, but he is still being followed by the doctors. Sitting in those waiting rooms really changes your perspective on what a busy schedule actually means.

The more the pressure built up this year, the more a familiar truth rose to the surface. It is a belief that has followed me for a long time, but the turbulence of 2025 turned it into an anchor. In those quiet, bewildering moments at the end of a day, I realized once again that life is just a biological fact until we give it a reason to be more, a purpose. My purpose is found in connection. It is about making sure that my presence in this world actually matters to the people I encounter.

I did not just give this year; I also received so much. I think of my external mentor who spent time talking to me about whatever topic I threw at her. I think of my former colleague who accepted my request for help without asking any questions. I think of my work colleagues who ploughed on with me under tight deadlines and senseless requests. I feel very fortunate because of them. They reminded me that even when people try to take advantage, there are others who show up with genuine hearts.

The ultimate confirmation came on December 30th. I got a card from S who told me I had made her life more significant and meaningful. She probably has no idea how much that meant to me. In a year where I often felt drained or used, that one card was a sign that I am on the right path. It reminded me why I keep trying to be the person I am. I am learning to focus my energy on the people who actually value the effort.

Looking Ahead: From Feasting to Fighting

Did I try my best in this year (2025)? Yes. I can say that without a shadow of a doubt.

I officially head back to work tomorrow after a solid two weeks of "The Great Hibernation." I joked with my husband that we essentially slave away for 11 months and two weeks just so we can earn fourteen glorious days of indulgence, feasting, and sleeping until noon. Honestly? It was worth it.

I am heading into 2026 with a better sense of my own value and a lot of gratitude for the people who actually show up for me. I hope you all had a good rest and feel ready for whatever comes next.

2025 Christmas Eve Dinner

Another Christmas, what an eventful year, workwise and healthwise, for both of us. Let's move on from this and reset for a positive 2026.

Starter

Bistro salad with Fried Prawns

Main

Slow Cooked Beef Rump

Brussel Sprouts and Chestnuts

Honey Roasted Carrots

Braised Red Cabbage

Dessert

Bûche de Noël